It’s Father’s Day. Nothing says “dad”, quite as well as cheesy, corny, and sometimes flat out dumb dad-jokes. So, this Father’s Day give the gift of humor. I’ve only been a dad for 4 years, but telling dumb jokes is one skill, I feel like I’m able to bring to the table. Not only do I enjoy comedy that makes kids and adults laugh, as a dad, but also it’s a big part of my job. So with it being Father’s Day weekend I thought I would post 27 of the best…dad-jokes.
- What’s brown and sticky?
- How many tickles does it take to get an octopus to laugh?
- What did the rain cloud wear under his pants?
- What happens when it rains cats and dogs?
You might step in a poodle!
- What do you call a flying monkey?
A hot air baboon! (You call a political monkey the same thing)
- What do you call a monkey on a minefield?
Ba-booom! (PETA doesn’t like that one)
- What do you call a cow with no legs?
- What do you call a cow with two legs?
- What’s brown and green and will kill you if it falls from a tree?
A pool table.
- How does NASA organize a birthday party?
- DId you hear Office Depot is now renting out it’s space for birthday parties? You know what they yell when you walk in?
- What do you call it when Batman skips church?
- Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
The food is great but there’s no atmosphere.
- I had a vegetarian girl come up to me and say she was glad to see me again. I was confused though…
I’d never met her-bi-vore.
- What do you call it when a dinosaur crashes his car?
- What’s the smartest dinosaur?
- What does a vegetarian zombie eat?
- What do you call a fake noodle?
- What do you call cheese that’s not yours?
Na-cho cheese. (That one’s not very goud-a)
- What’s Adam and Eve’s easiest school subject?
- Who’s the smartest person in the Bible?
I don’t know but Abraham knew a Lot.
- Who’s the funniest person in the Bible?
Samson. He brought the house down.
- What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
You’d think it be “Rrrrr” but it’s actually… the “C”.
- How come pirates never play cards?
Because they’re always standing on the deck.
- How come the pony couldn’t sing?
Because it was a little hoarse.
- How come the opera singer went out on a boat?
She wanted to hit the high-“C”!
- How do you know if a joke is a dad-joke?
The punchline is…”a-pparent”.